“Some people cannot see a priest on a mountain of sugar”

Football managers’ moans, Gareth Bale’s three lungs, the jockeys’ and F1 championships, and England cricket and rugby teams ahead of showdowns with Australia are collected in this week’s sporting quotes by IAN COLE

“All that heroic failure nonsense doesn’t interest. We’ve got diddly squat, zero, zilch… Well done Sir Alex, but I’d prefer to be going in now and drinking his fine wine with a point. Instead, it’ll taste like vinegar” Mick McCarthy suffers the frustration of Wolvers’ defeat in stoppage time at Manchester United.

“He got a red card for what? I want to know why he got a red card. The referee must explain to me why. It was not the right decision” Roberto Mancini, the Manchester City manager, following Mario Balotelli’s sending off at West Brom.

“What we could see from 50 metres the referee couldn’t see from five. I’m sorry to use the Harry Redknapp word, but it was a farce. We are polite people and don’t jump around the referee, but maybe we’ll have to change” Avram Grant, the West Ham boss, has a familiar beef about officials too.

“We’ll have boosted the licensing trade in Swansea tonight. I’ll probably do it myself as well. We’ll have a nice night” Brendan Rogers is a happy manager after Swansea win the derby at Cardiff.

Champion feeling: Paul Hanagan

“I’m gobsmacked. My only target at the start of the season was to get to 100 winners. Richard has been an absolute gentleman throughout and worked so hard to catch me. I thought the world of him before and even more so now” Paul Hanagan is only the third Northern-based rider in a century to win the Flat jockeys’ championship, beating Richard Hughes.

“It may seem strange but now I’m 19th in the world I am actually closer to being No.1 than when I was ranked No.3” Padraig Harrington.

“It’s nice to show everybody there is a reason I got to be No.1 and I think I did that” Lee Westwood, after a 66 at the HSBC Champions in Shanghai, his first tournament since reaching world No.1 ranking.

“Don’t expect me to come out on the television after a game, ever. Because I won’t. If you want me to talk rubbish and say it was a good decision, don’t bother getting me out after a game. I’ll just get on the coach and go home” Harry Redknapp challenges the FA to charge him for his comments over the Nani goal for Manchester United. They didn’t.

“Some people cannot see a priest on a mountain of sugar” Rafa Benitez.

“He told me I had to learn English quickly and to go to the hairdresser as fast as I could to get my hair cut. It was like a joke, but I think he maybe meant it too” Bebe, Manchester United’s Portuguese recruit, on his introduction to Sir Alex Ferguson.

“Coming from Glasgow, the shipyards and the trade unions, it’s disappointing. I would have walked away” Karl Margerison, manager of FC United, believes Sir Alex Ferguson should have made a stand against the Glazer takeover of Manchester United.

“Harry Redknapp and England sounds right to me. For me, he is an elite manager. The great thing about him is he has worked his socks off to earn that right” Owen Coyle.

“We can’t be saying ‘Right, that’s the tough game out of the way’. If we get into that trap we’ll be beaten. It’s an experience for the players. This week we can take into next week. There won’t be wholesale changes because we would lose what we’ve taken out of this week” Martin Johnson, the England rugby coach, chastened by a 26-16 defeat to the All Blacks.

Foden: nerveless

“It’s a tradition and the culture back home. If I give any advice to my team mates it will be to stand tall, stare them back in the eyes and let them know we accept the challenge. Don’t poke the bear” Shontayne Hope, England’s own Maori, on countering the All Blacks’ Haka.

“I annoy people because I don’t get nervous. Even at club level you get guys who are throwing up before we run out, but I just sit there listening to my iPod, singing away. The way I see it, I’ve been picked for a reason, as the coaches trust me to do a good job. So I just have to get on with doing what I have to do” Ben Foden on life in the Twickenham dressing room.

“As a kid I never liked it when my parents teased me by not answering my questions. Well now I’m in a position to tease you. We will see what I do” Sebastian Vettel refuses to say if he will obey Red Bull team orders in this weekend’s final F1 Grand Prix in Abu Dhabi.

“There’s a saying that used to kill me when I was growing up. ‘It’s the  taking part that counts’. No it isn’t. If I turn up and lose I’m distraught. You turn up to win. If you get a 100 and lose, what does it mean?” Stuart Broad arrives in Australia with a touch of English steel.

“There we were trying to toughen ourselves up mentally for the Ashes and all we got were smiles, handshakes and polite applause” Paul Collingwood is taken aback by a warm reception for the tourists in Perth.

Haile Gebrselassie: record run comes to an end

“I’ve had no discussion with my manager, with anybody. I’ve discussed it with myself and it’s better to stop here” Haile Gebrselaisse, 37, greatest distance runner in history, says he is quitting after limping out of the New York Marathon with knee tendinitis.

“Gareth Bale literally has three lungs” Jamie Redknapp demonstrating that playing on the wii does not help with your knowledge of human physiology.

“I gave him four days off last week because he’d been working so hard. I told him to go abroad for a few days and he did. He went to Cardiff to stay at his Mum’s” Harry Redknapp again, this time about hot property Gareth Bale.

“I have no problem with players who have a drink. It’s a personal choice and I respect that. I just don’t like the taste. That’s simply how it is.” Gareth Bale can’t help his good-boy image.

Who is worthy of your vote for the SJA British Sports Awards?

Voting closes today.

Check out our experts’ views here:

Sportsman of the Year

Cricketer Graeme Swann

Jump jockey AP McCoy

Golfer Graeme McDowell

Boxer David Haye

Sportswoman of the Year

Swimmer Fran Halsall

Olympic slider Amy Williams

Team of the Year

Voting for the SJA’s annual British Sports Awards is now open. Only SJA members may vote, and they are allowed to vote only once, when they must choose their top three choice for Sportsman, Sportswoman and Team of the Year.

Deadline for voting is November 9.

Tickets to attend the SJA British Sports Awards on December 8 are also now on sale.